The Invisible girl

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Posts tagged with "love yourself"

Everyone’s beautiful

The other day, I wrote a rather dismal post that involved me jealously moaning about a teenage trans* girl who I thought was far better looking than me. Looking back on that blog now has made me realise just what a rude and selfish fool I was being. I say this because today I’ve realised that absolutely everyone is beautiful, despite what they might think.

I understand that this may sound like one of those clichéd ridden, feel-good blogs, and perhaps it is, but that doesn’t make my my words any less valid. I earnestly believe that whether you’re overweight, underweight, short, tall, hairy, hairless, scruffy, tidy, muscular, puny, masculine or feminine; we’re all extraordinarily gorgeous in our own unique and wonderful ways.

People may judge you for the way that you might look, but their opinion isn’t factual. They have no evidence to back their words up with. Just because a neighbour or a friend might think that you’re weird looking or unappealing does not mean that they’ve uncovered some universal truth. Those people are not your designer and they didn’t create the concept of beauty. They just happen to possess an opinion of what is fetching and what is the opposite. Their perspectives are not universal and there shall always be people who disagree with them.

Even if a large proportion of society beleives that someone is considered ugly, it doesn’t make them right. Many people were once convinced that the world was flat, yet look how wrong that turned out to be. You don’t see professors of geology going “well all evidence suggests that the earth is spherical in shape, but then to counter that, people did say that it was flat.” Of course they don’t. They simply admit that everyone was completely wrong.

At university, there was a young girl named Lilly. Lilly was a 20 year old trans* woman who was often mocked and criticised for “not being feminine enough”. Her housemates called her ugly and some people even got annoyed that she “didn’t make a convincing enough female”. But guess what? I saw her, and they were wrong! She was an attractive girl. So what if she didn’t totally “pass” in the conventional birth-assigned-female way. She made a good looking woman. Girls most certainly do not need to be 100% feminine to look good; they look great in every shape and size.

Society has built this paradigm of what is ugly and what is beautiful. The social engineers of society (e.g. TV, films, parents, peers, teachers and magazines) have fed us this dumb lie that a certain type of girl is beautiful; whilst anyone who doesn’t match their criteria is apparently unworthy of attention. What a pathetic little lie this paradigm is. Yes, the slim and feminine women in these magazines and films do look fantastic, but so does every other girl.

And for that matter, every single gender that exists looks fantastic. This is not just a “girls are beautiful” post. Every goddamn human looks superb in one way or another.

If anyone out there feels like crap because some heartless fool called them fat, manly, ugly or whorish, tell them to get stuffed. People criticise others no matter what they look like.

I get criticised all the time; no matter how I look.

Back in 2008 I was fifteen stone, whereas today I’m ten stone. Back then, my friends use to call me fat. They told me that I needed to get to the gym, that I should buy some bigger clothes and that I must quit the booze before I get fatter. Today, however, my friends’ say I look ill. They insist that I stop exercising so profusely, that I need to start purchasing clothes for a slimmer build and that I need to get a goddamn Guinness down my throat before I curl over and die.

But screw them; I like my new slim look. I love working out, eating healthily and coming across as more feminine. They may not like it, but then I’m not doing it for them; I’m doing it all for me. And if I get big again, well so what. I enjoyed myself when I was fifteen stone. I ate well and I enjoyed my booze. Doesn’t matter what my friends and enemies thought about me. It’s not their goddamn body!   

So on the whole, my self-pitying blog from several days ago is a load of old tosh. Whether you’re cis or trans*, everybody looks bloody fabulous, including me. Does that make me a self-loving fool? Why yes it does, but then everyone should feel that way about themselves, because they’re goddamn incredible!

Remember that judgements are light years away from facts; they’re just the by-products of idiots who can’t keep their silly traps shut.